A Slacker's Aphorisms Part 2: The Mark Twain edition

"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."

"You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus."

"There is nothing lower than the human race except the French."

"Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it."

"Love your enemy, it'll scare the hell out of him."

"The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them."

"I've never killed a man, but I've read many an obituary with a great deal of satisfaction. (Also attributed to Clarence Darrow.)"

"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great."

"It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand"
-Mark Twain

Other Aphorisms.....

"There is nothing more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity"
- Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
-George Carlin